From Engineer to Manager: Embracing the Responsibility of Leadership

#1. The Road to Becoming an Engineering Manager When I first transitioned into an engineering manager (EM) role, I had a clear picture of what the job would be. I’d still work with code, guide the team, and maybe even spend a little time making technical decisions. But what no one had prepared me for was the weight of responsibility that came with the title.

I quickly realized that being an EM isn’t about writing the code anymore—it's about leading the people who write the code. Suddenly, I wasn’t just responsible for delivering features or hitting deadlines. I was responsible for the effectiveness of the entire team. It was as though I had taken on the role of a coach, but instead of athletes, I was coaching engineers.

This shift in mindset was harder than I had imagined.

#2. The Power of Mindset: What I Didn’t Know One day, after a particularly stressful sprint, I found myself wondering, “Am I doing enough?” I had spent hours analyzing code, meeting with engineers, and solving problems, but I still felt like something was off. The team wasn’t quite as cohesive as I had hoped, and our outcomes weren’t as sharp as they could have been.

That’s when it hit me: I had fallen into the trap of thinking like an individual contributor again. I was still operating with the mindset that my job was to handle technical challenges myself—rather than empowering my engineers to solve those challenges. The truth is, my role had changed. As an EM, I was no longer responsible for writing the code; I was responsible for my team’s success. The way they performed would determine whether I succeeded or not.

Think of it like a soccer coach. Let’s call her Barbara. Barbara used to be a fantastic player, but now, as a coach, her role is to ensure her players are positioned well, motivated, and prepared. She doesn’t run down the field scoring goals anymore, but everything that happens on that field is a direct reflection of the preparation and guidance she provided. The same holds true for an EM. Your engineers build the product, but how well they perform depends on how you guide, support, and empower them.

#3. The Right Mindset: Taking Full Responsibility As I embraced this new mindset, I understood the full weight of my responsibility. Yes, my engineers did the technical work. But everything else—team dynamics, talent acquisition, career growth, and even firing—was on my shoulders.

I had to stop thinking, “It’s not my job to handle that” or “I can’t control everything.” Sure, I couldn’t control when someone got sick or if a personal emergency arose, but I could control how I prepared for those moments. I could make sure we had the right processes in place for when things didn’t go according to plan. I could get to know my team deeply enough to anticipate challenges before they even surfaced.

This realization was both liberating and daunting. But once I took ownership of it, my mindset shifted from reactive to proactive. I began to view problems as opportunities to learn, grow, and shape the team’s future rather than obstacles to avoid.

#4. The Dangers of the Wrong Mindset I quickly noticed that I wasn’t the only one struggling with the wrong mindset. I had seen other engineering managers pass off problems to others or hope things would work out on their own. “It’s someone else’s problem,” they’d say when a difficult conversation needed to happen. Or they’d “hope it takes care of itself” when team dynamics were off, hoping that things would magically improve without intervention.

But here’s the problem: when you adopt this mindset, it doesn’t just hurt you—it hurts your entire team. The lack of ownership spreads like wildfire, and soon, no one is taking responsibility for the team’s success. Deadlines are missed. Morale drops. And the team becomes stuck in a cycle of stagnation.

I also realized that many EMs struggled with something even deeper—stress. The weight of responsibility is real. The temptation to delegate tough decisions, pass the buck, or simply ignore the difficult parts of management is strong. But that’s the easy way out. And ultimately, it leads to burnout. So, I learned that if I truly wanted to succeed as an EM, I had to take ownership of everything—good and bad—and lead by example.

#5. Practicing the Right Mindset: A Continuous Journey I’m not going to lie: adopting the right mindset wasn’t easy. It took practice. There were days when I doubted myself or questioned whether I was doing enough. But every time I made a decision that was focused on the team’s long-term success rather than just my own comfort, I saw the results. My engineers trusted me more. The team became more cohesive. And, slowly but surely, our outcomes improved.

I learned to hold myself accountable—not just for delivering results, but for empowering my team to deliver them. I practiced looking ahead, anticipating challenges, and finding ways to minimize risks. And when things went wrong (as they inevitably do), I focused on learning from them rather than pointing fingers or feeling defeated.

One of the most important t

hings I did was build a support system. I reached out to other EMs, mentors, and even my own manager to share struggles and get feedback. No one had all the answers, but together, we found solutions and strengthened our own mindsets.

#6. The Impact of the Right Mindset Now, when I look at my team, I no longer see just a group of engineers working on code. I see individuals with potential, each with their own strengths and challenges. I see a team that is continuously improving because they know I have their backs. They know I’m there to guide them, empower them, and help them grow—just as Barbara, the soccer coach, would guide her players to success.

The truth is, being an engineering manager is tough. It’s demanding. It’s stressful. And sometimes, it feels thankless. But it’s also one of the most rewarding roles you can have. When you get the mindset right, you begin to transform not just your team’s work, but their careers, their growth, and their future successes.

So, take the leap. Embrace the responsibility. Cultivate the right mindset. And remember: your success is inextricably linked to the success of the team you lead.